Hits & Misses: Avengers Infinity War

Miss: After everything went on in Thor Ragnarok, half of what's left of the Asgardian survivors are killed.

Real Talk: I want to be shocked that Loki’s dead but its Loki, there’s no telling with that guy.

Hit/LOL: Drax's ability to become invisible.

Hit: Hulk vs Thanos

Hit: Stark and Strange banter.

Miss: Banner can’t Hulk out.

Hit: The Black Order

LOL: “Space Donut”

Miss: Just how exactly is Vision capable to look human? Is it the mind stone, is Scarlet Witch doing that?

Hit: Thor goes off to get a new hammer, Stormbreaker.

Miss: Unfortunately this probably means that Beta Ray Bill won’t be in the MCU.

Miss/LOL: Star Lord’s annoying dick-measuring.

Surprised: RED SKULL!!

Miss: Gamora is dead…..

Hit: The movie spares no expense to make Thanos a flesh out character.

Hit: PETER DINKLAGE!!!

Miss: Stark, Strange, Parker and half of the Guardians almost taken off Thanos’ gauntlet only to have Star Lord to fuck it up.

Hit: Thanos calls out Dr. Strange for not using the Time Stone.

Hit/LOL: Rocket: “How much for the gun?” Bucky: “It’s not for sale.” Rocket: “Alright... How much for the arm?” “Bucky ignores him and runs off” Rocket: “I’m getting that arm.”

Miss: Bucky dead…

Miss: Black Panther dead…

Miss: Falcon dead…

Miss: Groot dead…

Miss: Drax dead…

Miss: Mantis dead…

Miss: Dr Strange dead…

Miss: Spider-Man dead…

Miss: Vision dead…

Miss: Scarlet Witch dead…

Miss: Nick Fury dead…

Hit: I don’t think there’s been any movie that’s left me emotionally drained in a good way like this movie has.

Real Talk: I'm probably speaking for myself when I say fuck Captain Marvel.

Hits & Misses: Justice League

Miss: Apparently Henry Cavil was starring in another movie the same time as this one and had a mustache. But for some reason the director of that movie didn't want to shave it off for the reshoots. So the studio behind Justice League thought it was a great idea to CGI the mustache. That explains why the hell his face looked so weird at the start of this movie.

Hit: Nice backgrounds of Gotham City.

Miss: Batman just says Alfred’s name within an earshot of a tied up criminal. Jackass.

Hit: Bad ass Wonder Woman action scene.

Miss: Luthor had notes about the Mother Boxes, since when?

Miss: Aquaman out loudly mentions Bruce’s alter ego out in public.

Miss: Let’s see, “a god-like being comes to Earth for a power source in order to conquer it”. Yup, Steppenwolf is Discount Loki.

Miss: And speaking of Loki that Boomtube looks a lot like a Discount Bi-Frost.

Hit: Amazons vs Steppenwolf

Hit: All these gorgeous Amazons!

Miss: This is probably because I’m use to the Barry Allen/Flash from the CW but this Barry acts more like Wally West. Not that I gotta problem with Wally but that’s what this guy’s acting like instead of being Barry. Guess he didn’t get the right memo.

Miss: “Three races band together to stop a common threat long ago” Gees I wasn’t expecting a copy/paste Lord of the Rings flashback from Diana’s story about Steppenwolf. Guess I should add Discount Sauron.

Miss: Also apparently the three Mother Boxes are Discount Infinity Stones. Just so much inadequate writing that if I roll my eyes any further and I’d be staring at my brain.

Hit: That Diana ass!

Hit: Mera.

Miss: As much as it’s nice to hear about Aquaman’s backstory but bringing that up AFTER Steppenwolf attacked Atlantis and took the second Mother Box is kinda random and out of context.

Hit: The Nightcrawler

Hit/LOL: Batman: “Sorry, didn’t bring a sword.”

Hit: Did they use the musical cue from the Burton Batman movies?!

Miss: It’s as if the writing is making Batman feel so unsure to lead a team. I mean sure the guy’s got a million problems but as far as I know gathering/leading a team isn’t one of them.

Miss: So Batman wants to use one of the Mother Boxes with the Genesis Chamber that created a monster that nearly destroyed Metropolis to bring back Superman from dead. Never mind the possibility of Superman would go ape shit and kill everything. For a guy who’s to be this genus detective and bad ass he really sucks at common sense.

Miss: Also how does he have any idea how these Mother Boxes work or if it'll work with the Genesis Chamber? At least in Avengers Endgame the team studied the Infinity Stones to understand how to use them. Batman is just pulling bullshit out of his ass.

Miss: Also, also good job making Superman’s death in Dawn of Justice completely meaningless.

Miss: And of course Superman goes ape shit soon after he’s back from the dead. Why was this a good idea again?

Hit: Wonder Woman v Superman

Miss: Flash’s ugly ass derp face.

Hit: Flash v Superman

Hit: Did they use the musical cue from the Donner Superman movies?!

Hit: Ape Shit Superman: “Tell me something...do you bleed?” Déjà Vu eh, Batsy?

Miss: Superman calms down after Lois shows up…. I guess when all else fails the power of boners will prevail.

Miss: Flash: “Is this a bad time to mention about my blood sugar?” OK seriously Barry you need to shut the hell up, you’re not funny.

Hit/LOL: Cyborg: “Just keep The Little Merman away from me.” Now see here, that was funny.

Real Talk: I see what they did, having the climax of the movie take place at a barely populated city. Just so people won’t complain about how the heroes are destroying a well-populated city while in the process of saving it. Somebody behind the writing was listening.

Miss: So after they shattered his axe, all of the Parademons just attack Steppenwolf. How convenient. Yes I'm aware of that the Parademons cans sense fear but still convenient. 

Hit: Cyborg: “Booyah…”

BONUS ROUND

Miss: So Luthor escapes from prison with no explanation of how or when….OK.

Miss: Darkseid’s name is mention but we don’t get a glimpse of him.

Hit: Superman and Flash have a race, nice!

Hit: DEATHSTROKE!

Hit: Luthor wants to start a league of his own.