50th Hits & Misses: Mortal Kombat

Real Talk: Before diving into the Resident Evil series I wanna review the one video game adaptation film that was actually good back when Paul W.S. Anderson actually gave a damn. Instead of making shallow in-name garbage while shacking up with a certain actress that I have a perpetual stink eye for. And in case you're wondering no I won't be reviewing Monster Hunter.

Hit: This film's theme music....

Hit: And sense I'm here, this film's soundtrack.

Hit: This film's opening title sequence.

Hit: I think they made a good choice casting Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa as Shang Tsung.

Hit: Trevor Goddard as Kano was just too good, so good in fact that Midway Games/NetherRealm Studios changed Kano in the later games to match with the film version.

Real Talk: Although it's a real shame that Trevor Goddard isn't around to reprise the role in the current MK games. God rest his soul.

Hit: Also credit to the make-up department for Kano's half metal face.

Real Talk: *Johnny Cage leaving a movie set.* Discount Steven Spielberg?

Miss: Movie doesn't fully explain/establish how the fighters were chosen to participate in the tournament. They're either hand picked through deception by Shang Tsung or in Liu Kang's case he up and volunteers to participate the tournament.     

Hit: It's no coincidence that they cast Christopher Lambert to play an immortal bad ass. 

Hit: The some of the special effects weren't exactly on the levels of Jurassic Park but it beats the shoestring effects from every Asylum movie. 

Real Talk: Originally Cameron Diaz was casted to play Sonya Blade before being replaced due to an injury. To be honest I'm glad they went for a different actress for Sonya Blade. Not saying Cameron Diaz is terrible but back in 1995 I just don't see her as Sonya.

Hit: You can tell they spared no expense when it came to the set designs and locations.

Hit: Say what you will but at least this movie attempted at staying accurate story-wise with the source material. Unlike that previous fighting game adaptation film which disregard the source material for the sake of being just another over the top action flick. 

Hit: Raiden talking to Liu Kang, Johnny and Sonya: "One of you will decide the out come of the tournament. The faith of billions will depend upon you." *laughs* "Sorry..." 

Miss: Not gonna lie the effects for the Reptile creature was really meh.

Miss: *Shang Tsung's lackeys removed all the dining tables to make room for Sub Zero's demostration.* What a waste of all that food.

Hit: *Sub Zero uses a fatality move on a lackey whom explodes into chunklets.*

Hit: Goro is by far the best practical effects ever done in this film. 

Hit: Also he actually does things in this movie unlike some other four armed character in the sequel who does absolutely nothing until she's killed off.

Miss: In most tournament based action movies like Bloodsport there's always a bracket system to keep score on the winning fighters. Here there's no such system, so how does Shang Tsung keep track on all the winning and lost fighters in this tournament?  

Hit: Shang Tsung absorbing the soul from a defeated fighter: "Your soul is mine..." That line with that face.

Hit: Kano talking to Sonya: "Ello baby... Did you miss me?"

Hit: Sonya's hand stand leg lock move!

Hit: Kano while in Sonya's leg lock: "Oh give me a break!" Sonya: "OK..." *Snaps his neck.* Not a very good choice of words.

Miss: I love the effects of  Scorpion's spear move but why did they changed it from a kunai attached to a rope to some weird bird-serpent thing?

Hit: *Johnny Cage vs Scorpion* Ed Boon provided Scorpion's voice for his famous phrase, "GET OVER HERE!!!" And some other phrases in the film.

Hit: Johnny's Shadow Kick move!

Hit: Both the Johnny vs Scorpion and Liu Kang vs Reptile fights are the best ones in the movie. The soundtrack for both these fights helps too.

Hit: Scorpion's TOASTY move!

Real Talk: I really can't blame the film for being PG-13 for all it's worth.

Miss: At least we're shown Johnny brought some extra clothes, probably. But where did Sonya get the tank top and the shorts? She didn't bring any baggage when she was chasing after Kano on to Shang Tsung's ship.

Hit: *Johnny does his Nut Cracker Punch on Goro.* Yeah I know, you can't actually do the Nut Cracker Punch on Goro in the games. But honestly does it really matter?

Hit/LOL: Johnny talking to Goro: "Those were $500 sunglasses, asshole."

Miss:  The Reptile creature grabbed by some weird statue then transforms into Reptile from the first game. Now how or why did that happened, no idea.

Miss: Liu Kang doesn't yell his signature "YOGOLBOLGOLBODOGODO"  when doing his Bicycle Kick on Reptile.

Miss: I know Shang Tsung's back was turned but I still call bullshit of Liu Kang not noticing him shapeshifted right in front of him.

Hit: *Shang Tsung falls to his death of the pit of spikes like in the first game.*

Miss: Liu Kang: "Flawless Victory..." Ugh actually Shang Tsung hit you plenty of times before you defeated him. 

Miss: And here the movie ends on a sequel bait which leads to a really disappointed sequel.

Hits & Misses Halloween: Siren

Hit: *Nyx and some cop find dead bodies and a ritual circle at a run down church.* Cop: "What are they? Cultists? Satanists?" Nyx: "Amateurs...." I like this guy already....

Real Talk: *Red shirt cop gets stealth killed by young Lily then is dropped to the ground with his mouth ripped out.*Nyx: "Well that's not good..." Thank you Captain Obvious.... 

Miss: Jonah and Eva making out while really sucking at roleplaying.

Miss: Jonah's brother, Mac is Discount Stifler.

Hit: Big Black Ass shot.

Miss: What stripper wears flip-flops?

Real Talk: *Some guy talks to Mac about a special underground club.* Suddenly I'm getting Bordello of Blood flashbacks.

Hit: *Jonah enters a private room with a woman popping out on the other side of a small window.* Beautiful woman jump scare.

Hit: The actress playing Lily has the most beautiful eyes.

Real Talk: Nyx: "I want the fondest memories of your mother, from each of you. All of you... Now you give me that and Jonah will have a night he will never forget." There is foreshadowing in what he says.... 

Real Talk: *Lily starts singing to Jonah and he starts having intense sexual flashbacks of his previous relationships.* It's like he just had a wet dream/acid trip combo.

Real Talk: *Elliot asked the woman bartender for a "leech drink" and she serves it up.* Elliot: "What's it call?" Woman bartender: "Murder..." *Elliot and the others laugh.* Given when the movie reveals what she can do later I don't think she meant it as a joke.   

Miss: I understand Jonah wanting to do the right thing of setting Lily free from her locked room. But this is a horror movie and that would obviously be a bad idea.

Hit: After Lily snatches the keys from one of Nyx's masked men. She and Jonah hide in the restroom where she manages to unlock the bracelet on her ankle and proceeds to do a raptor sneak attack the masked man and feast upon the man. While the same time she ripped the guy's junk off.   

Hit: At least Jonah got the right idea of getting the fuck out of there.

Miss: Jonah didn't even went out the front door, he just appeared out of nowhere at the car. How and where did he got out the club.

Hit: Jonah did the smart idea of grabbing his phone from the glovebox before running away from the bad shit.

Hit: Nice night sky shot of the thunderstorm.

Hit: As much as Mac deserves to get lectured by Jonah, he still has a good point when it comes to Jonah decided to let out a literal man eater.

Hit: *Jonah realizes that Lily is following him by scent and immediately covers himself with mud.* Suddenly I'm getting Predator flashbacks.

Miss: I guess Jonah and Mac are just lucky enough for Lily unable to just look down at her feet to see if they're hiding in the tall grass.

Hit: *Rand's about to get tortured as Nyx watches.* Nyx: "You boys stuck your hand in the fire tonight and it is my right to see you get burned." Rand: "Why?!" Nyx: "Why? Cause you messed with the wrong motherfucker." This scene along demonstrates what a mean motherfucker Nyx is. 

Hit: Movie muffles all sound when Jonah plugs his ears with earbuds to block Lily's singing.

Hit: *Lily finds Jonah hiding behind the cafe counter.* Lily talking to Jonah: "I like you..." Oh Lily, you had me at "I like you". 

Hit: Also really good makeup effect for Lily's creature face.

Miss: Does Lily have teleportation powers, how did she get ahead of Jonah on the other side of the cafe kitchen door before he reached it? 

Real Talk: If I was in Jonah's position I wouldn't stop Lily from having sex with me.

Hit: Even covered in blood, Lily is so beautiful.

Real Talk: *As the two of them having sex, Lily uses her tail to "drydock" him. Suddenly I'm getting Splice flashbacks.

Hit: So it turns out the woman bartender has leeches for hair that she uses to absorb certain memories from people. Then those memories are transfer to other via drinks, hence why Elliot was acting odd earlier he was experiencing memories of someone killing a person. That's an interesting concept. 

Miss: *Mac shows up at the church to save Jonah only to get stabbed and killed by Nyx.* Yeah he was an asshole but at least he was being redeemable. 

Hit: *Lily kills Nyx with her tail.* That's some awesome Mortal Kombat Fatality move there.

Real Talk: Despite the fact of Lily being a creature from god knows where, she not necessarily the antagonist of the film. You even kinda feel sorry for her as she watches Jonah leaving the church with Rand.

Miss: Obvious fake as fuck photoshopped wedding photo ever.

Real Talk: If you listen closely Jonah is humming Lily's song.

Real Talk: *Jonah and Eva make out on their one year anniversary only to be reveal a bit later that it was actually Lily while Eva was sleeping on the couch.* Well at least he didn't get drydocked this time.

Real Talk: *Jonah almost convinces Lily to leave until Eva wakes and reacts to her. Lily's about to kill her until Jonah tells Lily that he'll go with her, sparring Eva in the process. Lily then takes Jonah and two fly off into the stormy night sky as Eva screams his name.* I don't know about anyone else but I considered this as a happy ending.

Real Talk: Fun fact, this movie's a spinoff, feature length adaptation of the V/H/S anthology segment, Amatuer Night. They even got the original actress, Hannah Fierman to reprise her Lily role.

Hits & Misses Halloween: Rupture

Real Talk: Originally I was gonna review Eli but looking back to it there was barely anything to work with. So here's this backup movie instead, enjoy.

Hit: Noomi Rapace in sci-fi horror thriller.

Miss: Big spider scare.... Fuck you movie!

Hit: Renee's son Evan is a bit of comic artist.

Real Talk: I just love Noomi's accent.

Real Talk: Suspicious surveillance cameras in horror movies are never a good sign.

Hit: Hi Michael Chiklis

Miss: Evan's dad is a real asshole.

Hit: *Renee is being abducted by two van drivers.* And there's that sexy scream of hers.

Miss: Normally the abductors would just duct tape the abductee's mouth but duct taping the whole head is kinda unnecessary. 

Hit: Gotta give credit the film's cinematography.

Hit: It's like I'm watching a horror version of 50 Shades of Gray. Which would be a lot better than the actual 50 Shades of Gray.

Hit: Hi Peter Stormare

Hit: *Renee's talking to another abductee in the next room. Until the abductors went into his room and to proceed to do god knows what as he screams "not my eyes" while there's a drilling sound revving in the background.* Well that didn't sound good at all but still scary though.

Hit: There's some pod people vibes from these people while they're testing Renee. Even that quark they do with caressing their faces on Renee's skin just makes them more alien in behavior. 

Miss: Oh god damn, another big ass spider scare!

Miss: Obvious CGI spider is obvious.

Hit: *Renee breaks out of her restraints and makes her way out the room from the vent.* Suddenly we went from sci-fi thriller 50 Shades to sci-fi thriller Die Hard.

Real Talk: *As Renee explores through the ventilation shafts, she sees other captives going through the similar "tests" as she has.* This group has been abducting people, injecting them with a solution and are putting through fear induced torture to trigger some type of change in them. Think of it as Resident Evil meets Hostel. 

Hit: Nice, intense music as Renee sneaks around this facility.

Hit: Renee sees one of them removing his contacts, revealing that his eyes are not normal.

Hit: *Dianne morphs her face to show Renee what she'll become if her genes are rupture.* Gross but cool effect.

Hit: You gotta love Peter Stormare's performance.

Real Talk: *Renee has a transparent helmet strapped to her head, which then is filled with spiders as she starts panicking.* Suddenly I'm getting the "AHHH NOT THE BEES" flashbacks.

Hit: *Renee starts bashing her head on anything to break open the helmet.* Gotta give credit to Noomi's performance in this scene.

Hit: Also more sexy Noomi screams.

Hit: *Renee continues into breaking the transparent helmet until she stops and begins to change. Indicating that she's finally rupture.* Honestly I'm glad this happened, I was curious to see if she would actually change. Would've been a bit disappointed if she didn't or died at the end.

Hit: Even as a newly evolved, emotionless genetic being, Noomi's still very beautiful.

Hits & Misses Halloween: Sweetheart

Hit: Movie later shows that there's something a lot worse than being stuck on an small island.

Miss: Jenn don't pull the sharp object out of Brad, now he's gonna bleed to death. Which he does shortly after she comes back with coconut milk.

Real Talk: *Jenn stumble across some very old belongings in the jungle.* Oh hey, a Game Boy!

Hit: *Jenn gets situated with fish for food, fresh water from the rainstorm and a makeshift tent.* Just because this is a horror movie doesn't mean the character has to be a dumbass.

Hit: *Jenn finds Brad's body dug up out eaten.* And the shit begins hitting the fan for Jenn.

Hit: *Another night on the island, Jenn spots an airplane flying overhead and quickly fires a flare gun. But as the plane continues flying away, the flare falls straight to the ocean until Jenn sees a silhouette of a large figure in the water as subtle music chings in.* This particular scene demonstrations that not every quiet scene in a horror movie needs to end with your face jump scares. And that it's OK to be subtle while building tension.

Hit: Movie has a Predator vibe with Jenn hiding from the creature while the movie keeps the creature hidden for now.

Real Talk: *Jenn builds a makeshift raft but doesn't work out so well.* At least she try to leave the island; better than just sitting on her ass.

Miss: So this sea creature can't even so much as tear through a hollow log where Jenn is hiding in.

Hit: So far the character Jenn is shown to be capable and adaptive to her current situation. Instead being another one dimensional Mary Sue with plot convenience powers, Jenn is an ordinary character dropped into an extraordinary situation and she has to rely on survival instincts to get out of it.  

Hit: Also despite the lack of dialogue so far the movie still provides important information through Jenn's action on the island.

Real Talk: *Jenn leaves a bait hung on a tree only to look away for a few seconds and the bait is gone.* Apparently the sea creature is freaking Batman.

Hit: *The next night Jenn is camping in the trees with a makeshift hammock until she spots the sea creature from a distance stalking quietly.* Another excellent example of subtle scares/tension without the predictively annoying jump scares.  

Hit: *After the sea creature tears down the hammock, Jenn makes a run to the beach with sea creature giving chase. The sea creature then jumps into the water able to catch with Jenn.* Better than just running after the main character until they do something dumb for the plot.

Real Talk: As interesting the creature is why does it only come to the island at night?

Miss: Why's Jenn giving them old ass sodas to Lucas and Mia? I mean yeah they been adrift for days and are really thirsty but them Coca-Colas have been on the island probably since the 90s. They gotta be flat as shit by now. 

Real Talk: Jenn talk to Lucas while showing him the makeshift spear: "I got it last night, that's black blood." Well as the saying goes, "if it bleeds, we can kill it". 

Miss: Jenn: "I'd rather die on the raft than this place." Mia: "You don't know what it's like out there." Well it can't be any worse than what's been coming to the island, unless you know something you're out telling. If I was in Jenn's position I'd take my chances with the raft.

Miss: Jenn's using Lucas' pocket knife which has dried up blood on it. Jenn never brings it up to him, it's never shown again and the movie doesn't follow up on it. I could guess that something bad happened on the raft but again the movie doesn't follow up on this plot point. And it's not like Lucas and Mia are gonna say anything to connect the narrative dots. Point being that it served no narrative purpose and was just a waste of a plot thread.

Real Talk: *Jenn stocks up and takes the raft until she's stopped by Lucas and Mia.* Now trying to leave those two behind was a bit douchey but in Jenn's defense she's gone through a lot of shit to stay any longer. It's not like the movie is treating Lucas and Mia like a couple of sketics they're just being idiots. 

Miss: Well Lucas is such a sweet guy. Jenn tries to warm him about the creature and all he does is talked her down like some scumbag pimp.

Real Talk: *Mia is near the water until she's attacked by the sea creature attacks. Lucas tries to fight it off but gets knocked away, after which the sea creature takes the wounded Mia out to the ocean.* I bet these two feel a lot safe now after that. And no I don't feel bad for Mia, she was given ample warning about the creature and choose to ignored them. So fuck that bitch....  

Miss: *Jenn and Lucas head out on the raft until the creature starts attacking the raft.* So it does come out during the day. And it hasn't done so this whole time because???

Hit: The creature design is incredible, even in CGI it's impressive.

Hit: Now the more I think about it I wouldn't be surprised if the creature designer was inspired by the Zoanoids from the Guyver anime/manga.

Hit: *Jenn sets off a field of fire and does a stab and run tactic.* Suddenly I'm getting Predators flashbacks.

Hit: Another believability from Jenn is that she's not built like Wile E Coyote just to take a shit ton of punishment because the script says so. Unlike some other character whom just magically shrugs off a lethal death punch to chest with zero explanation of fucking how.

Hits & Misses Halloween: Bite

Hit: This is most impressive body horror film I've seen thus far. It's just right up there with The Fly (1986)

Real Talk: *Camera POV of Casey and her friends having their bachelorette vocation.* This is not some generic found-footage-movie, trust me and this will have a point later. 

Miss: A fake out scare, never a good start in a horror movie.

Miss: A jump scare by title card....

Hit: Casey's uncertainty of having a baby plays a nice parallel into what happens to her later in the movie.

Miss: For lack of a better phrase, Casey's fiance's mother is a real asshole and you'll hate her a lot.

Hit: Although the movie's a slow burn but it does some good subtle hints that something's a bit off with Casey.

Real Talk: *Casey and Jared are having sex until he unnoticeably grabs hold of Casey's rather nasty bug bite on her hip.* Well that's one way to ruined a sex scene.

Hit: Credit to the prosthetic effects on the Casey's bug bite.

Hit: Credit to the makeup department for having Casey looking sick as a dog. 

Miss: Stop messing with the bug bite, woman!

Miss: Good on Casey to call a clinic but why not just go to a hospital already?

Hit: *In a nightmare scene, Casey gets a surprise baby shower until she starts leaking out insect eggs and everyone starts stepping on them.* Impressive scene, gross but impressive.

Hit: Also nice practical effect with the insect eggs.

Miss: Even after noticing all the weird insect eggs in her apartment, Casey still doesn't go to the hospital.

Real Talk: Jared's mother: "I know that is not my son's child in you." Well you're not wrong.

Hit: Casey starts this little head twitch as she continues to change. Rather nice touch to give her some quark to her metamorphosis.  

Hit: *Casey spews acidic vomit on Jared's mother's face which kills her.* Suddenly I'm getting The Fly (1986) flashbacks. And also Jared's asshole mother is dead and I couldn't be more happier.

Hit: The actress playing Casey is a real trooper with all the weird goo she spews and being covered with.

Real Talk: Casey's friend Jill is such a bitch, you'll see why later.

Hit: Casey's apartment now looks like the Xenomorph hive from Aliens.

Hit: *Casey starts peeling off one of her fingernails.* Suddenly I'm getting The Fly (1986) flashbacks, again. 

Real Talk: Casey's friend Kristen is clearly wearing those paper thin yoga pants because you can see her ass as clear as day.

Hit: And since I brought it up, Kristen ass shot.

Miss: *Casey holding Kristen's body after she unintentionally kills her.* What a minute, Kristen was totally blinking in this shot! How did the editors missed that?!

Miss: Jared is pissing blood because why? Also it's never brought up again.

Miss: *Jared and Jill are having sex in her car.* Dude, you just pissed blood not too long ago. For all you know you might have AIDS and you're now infecting the poor bitch.

Hit: *Casey screams to a point both Jared and Jill started puking in the middle of sex.* Casey uses Screech, it was super effective.

Hit: Once again credit to the makeup department with Casey's full transformation.

Miss: So looking like what she is now, apparently Casey went outside and retrieved Jill's laptop without being noticed by anyone.

Real Talk: So during the bachelorette vocation it turns out Jill had a guy to take sexual advantage on the drunken Casey. Just to get Casey "cheating" on camera so Jill can have Jared all to herself once she showed the video. Like I said, Jill is such a bitch.

Hit: Casey kills Jill....

Hit: *Casey stabs Jared with her stinger.* Suddenly I'm getting Splice flashbacks.

Hit: *Jared curve stomps the fuck out of Casey's head.* Nice and the practical gore effect was really awesome. 

Real Talk: A week later it turns out Jared was implanted with Casey's eggs as they hatch out from his still alive bady.

Miss: Another jump scare from the title card.

Hits & Misses Halloween: Legion of the Dead

Miss: This one dig site of an underground tomb has no security nor barricades that would've prevented one of the dirt bikers from falling into it. And even if there were any on site security then they really sucked at their jobs.

Miss: The second dirt biker doesn't have a flashlight on him nor isn't there any other lightsource from topside. So where's this light shining on the first dirt biker coming from?

Miss: In any well lit scene throughout the movie there's some weird glare effects that gets really distracting.

Miss: *A large rock falls on one of the dirt bikers, crushing his head.* The visual effects after the guy's head being crushed looks really cheap.

Miss: The opening title credits looks like it was made from someone using a step-by-step After Effects tutorial. It's looks that basic and cheap.

Miss: Poor Zach Galligan was dragged into this movie.

Hit: Also Zach Galligan

Miss: Poor Bruce Boxleitner was dragged into this movie.

Hit: Also Bruce Boxleitner

Miss: If this Egyptian tomb has booby traps then why not have safety measures to make sure it's actually safe? Is having a college professor and his students messing with stuff that can kill them is really a smart idea? Professor Ben-David is just begging to get sued from the pissed off parents. 

Miss: This is totally a lightning storm and not a stock cloud photo with obvious lightning effects slapped in on it. 

Miss: *Carter calling for a Professor Edwards.* I had to look up the cast list and found no such character by that name. So who the hell is this Professor Edwards? Was this a line mistake from the Carter character? Did the writers edit the script and didn't tell anyone? Who the hell knows....

Real Talk: So there's this tension between Molly, Carter and Molly's college professor. Molly and Bryan had a one night stand and Carter's pissed about it because he had feeling for her. But I honestly couldn't care and it just feels like those bland CW drama shows. 

Hit: Naked Egyptian Priestess

Hit: *Aneh-Tet drains the life force out of this one security guard.* The practical effect in this scene is really good to be honest.

Miss: But that lazy lightning effect when she drains him was unnecessary. 

Miss: Aneh-Tet was fully naked when she climbed out of the tomb in one scene, has some cloth wrapped on her bottom half in the next scene.

Hit: Once again really good practical effects with Bryan's death scene by Aneh-Tet.

Miss: But that moment when Aneh-Tet has some type of lightning breath weapon was really goofy effects-wise. 

LOL: Ben-David: "Where's my mummy?!"

Real Talk: You mean to tell me that while still naked, Aneh-Tet walked from the dig site to the motel (where Molly's staying) without being stopped or spotted by no one? OK.....

Miss: *Molly gives a towel to Aneh-Tet as she gets out of the motel pool.* I don't see the point of the towel giving a closer look of Aneh-Tet looking pretty dry despite she was just in a pool. Continuity, how does that work?

Real Talk: Kevyn talking to Aneh-Tet: "I'm Kevyn... Yeah, I know, I've already heard all the jokes." Well I haven't, care to share some?

Real Talk: *Aneh-Tet tries to touch Molly's sister, Kevyn by the vagina.* Apparently the movie invented the "grab them by the pussy" term before Trump did.

Miss: Them wall paintings don't exactly have the detailed likeness of Aneh-Tet. So how did Ben-David just recognize her on the spot when she arrived at the dig site? For all he know she could be his illegitimate love child.

Miss: And just like that Ben-David offers his students to Aneh-Tet in exchange to spare him. And of course he serves her now.

Real Talk: *Red Shirt Axel follows Aneh-Tet into the woods until she seduces and drains his soul.* Granted the guy's drunk off his ass but following some random hot woman in a horror movie is usually a bad idea.

Hit: Also Naked Egyptian Priestess, again.

Hit: *Aneh-Tet attempts to drain another student until he stabs her with a knife.* That's the smartest thing one of these red shirt students have done all movie.

Miss: The red shirt student only stabbed Aneh-Tet once in the stomach before he ran off. But for some reason her clothes are magically speckled with blood. Where did all that blood come from, Aneh-Tet wasn't bleeding that badly from this ONE stab wound. And the red shirt student wasn't bleeding at all after she attacked him. Magical blood speckles out of fucking nowhere!  

Miss: *Aneh-Tet finally drains the red shirt student's soul.* You know what's more annoying and needless than shaky cams? Shaky scenes through After Effects.

Miss/Sarcastic: *Sheriff Jones finding a bloody knife.* Oh yeah that's definitely a knife and not an obvious fake knife prop you've seen from Halloween stores.

Miss: *Carter translates an apology letter from Molly which reads. "CRTER I SORRY I HURT YOU GIVE ME PLEASE ANOTHER CHANCE LOVE MOLLY"* How the hell did Molly ever became an linguistics specialist with embarrassing grammar errors like this? 

Miss: How stupid do you have to be to misspell your own name from a different language and not be bothered to fix it? It's one thing to misspell your name by accident but this is just pitiful.

Miss: Also you can tell that Carter was just pretending to translate the letter in this scene. Meaning that someone on the film crew made this half assed translation and no one bothered to correct it whatsoever.

Miss: *Aneh-Tet attacks Carter but he managed to get away.* More cheapo lightning effects.

Real Talk: This movie has decent practical effects it's just a shame that they coincide with cheapo special effects.

Miss: *Red Shirt Justin running from Aneh-Tet until coming across dead Red Shirt Kara.* That red shirt Kara corpse clearly moved in the close up shot.

Miss/Sarcastic: Oh yeah, Ben-David clearly has a shaved head now and not wearing an obvious bald cap.

Miss: More shaky scene After Effects.

Hit: *One of Aneh-Tet's mummy warriors rips out of the red shirt student's spine.* Well that was kinda hilarious.

Real Talk: But seriously is there any point to feel sorry for these blandly developed red shirt students at all?

Miss: As cool as that was, I'm not buying one bit that Carter threw a pole at a mummy so hard that it gets pinned to a wall. Maybe if it was one of the mummies who did that, sure.

Miss: What made it necessary for this movie to have Aneh-Tet wearing an obviously fake as fuck Egyptian wig? 

Miss: I'm not convinced those are real dynamite Molly's using.

Miss: Hey Aneh-Tet, care to just zip Molly and Carter with your cheapo lightning effects while they're fighting your warriors? No, just gonna stay around because the script said so? OK....

Miss: Aneh-Tet has Molly by the throat but instead of instantly killing her she just randomly stalling. Unintentionally giving Molly plenty of time to stop her and the ritual. For a powerful priestess, Aneh-Tet sure has the logic and the attention span of a Bond villain.

Miss: I would love to add that the film's title is a load of bullshit. For a movie called "Legion of the Dead" there's only one Egyptian priestess and six mummies. Quite underwhelming, I say.... 

Hits & Misses: MindBlown

Hit: Movie may have a lame title but at least it's got more things happening than Speed of Thought.

Hit: In Medias Res done right.

Real Talk: Truck driver talking to young Jennifer Gaines: "Hey, look at you out here in the middle of nowhere. You want a ride little girl?" *Young Jennifer screams until the truck driver keels over and dies.* I'm sure that was a bit harsh but for all we know that guy could've been a Pedo.

Miss: Hard to tell if Young Jennifer is begging for water the way how bored she sounds.

Miss: It's established that Jennifer has telekinesis, so how exactly she managed to summoned a small rain cloud when she was a child? I'm pretty sure that telekinesis doesn't work that way. 

Hit: (Adult) Jennifer taking a refreshing shower. Granted you don't see much of the good bits but still.

Miss: *Jennifer and four other TKs going through an ionization scan.* Not that I don't appreciate the Jennifer cleavage but why does she have her blouse unzipped half way then zipps it up afterwards? Gertie doesn't have her blouse open like that so what was the point of Jennifer having her breasts nearly hanging out?

Hit: Jennifer ass shot.

Miss: White is a U.S. General yet he doesn't seem to be in General uniform. Seriously the guy looks like a bouncer than a U.S. General.

Hit: Basically the TKs are hooked to a weaponized Cerebro that allows them to create severe storms. Interesting concept....

Hit: *Close up shots the four TKs inside their helmets.* Suddenly I'm getting Iron Man flashbacks.

Miss: A news reporter keeps pointing to the "major devastation behind her" yet the movie shows no such "devastation". I mean yes this small town was hit by a freak tornado and lightning strikes yet it doesn't seem to look like the town's in complete ruin. It's as if the movie didn't had the budget to show the aftermath of the freak storm destruction. 

Miss: Also having these small town people TELLING what happened (while still not SHOWING the aftermath) doesn't help either.

Miss: Also, also the news report mentions about an earthquake, what earthquake? There was just the freak storm that hit the town, what freaking earthquake? Was there a scene taken out due to time and budget? Was there a miscommunication between the writers and editors? Did the people on post-production got batshit confused on the job? Even if there was an earthquake the movie did a piss poor job of showing it. 

Miss: Some of the visual effects can be quite embarrassing bad  especially how the composition don't seem to match up with the foregrounds and backgrounds. Like an amauter F/X guy spending five minutes in After Effects on most of the scenes. 

Hit: Although the practical effects are pretty good.

Miss: General White sends a strike team to retrieve two TKs (Jennifer and Adam) with nothing but guns. Not so much as having any special countermeasures whatsoever. Because sending normal people after a couple of superhumans has never gone wrong at all. 

Miss: This one woman on the strike team is on this dangerous retrieval mission without a helmet. While the other strike team members are clearly wearing helmets. She might as well have a sign over her head that reads "HEY, SHOOT HERE!"

Miss/Sarcastic: Oh wow, these well trained strike team were easily taken out by two psychically powerful people. I swear I didn't see this coming. 

Miss: So the other four TKs can manipulate the elements (Gretie with water, Clive with earth, Rick with fire and Ruben with electricity). So how is Jennifer able to summoned rain clouds or those lightning strikes that took out the strike team earlier? 

Miss: *In Jennifer's flashback: On the road with her dad as he keeps telling her to stop singing but she just kept on singing anyway. Resulting her dad getting angry to the point of crashing off road.* I know this is meant to be dramatic but it's kinda hard to sympathize with Jennifer when she practically cause the car crash. Annoying child characters are neither cute nor endearing and young Jennifer was no different. So yes if Jennifer wasn't being an annoying little shit that car crash wouldn't have happened.  

Miss: The movie doesn't even shown the car crash but instead shows the (sorta) aftermath. That raises so many questions but I'm just gonna chalk it up with one answer. The movie just didn't have the time and budget for a car crash effect.

Miss: Also young Jennifer didn't seem to be concerned about her dead dad with that look of the obliviously deadpan reaction on her face.

Miss: I postulate that the writers have confused telekinesis with psychokinesis because how else Adam can summon lightning like he's freaking Thor. Basically telekinesis is whatever the script deems it as convenient to the plot then just moving objects mentally.

Miss: Once again the Project MindBlown strike team are easily taken out superpower psychics.  

Miss: Jennifer gets a vision of Gertie fighting Rick, sensing that she might be in danger. But when Rick and Gertie clash powers, Jennifer doesn't so much as warn her nor psychically push her out of the way. Just stands there and does nothing until Gertie loses and gets burned alive.

Miss: Clive attempts to crush Jennifer, Adam and Ruben with a giant boulder. But Jennifer and Adam takes control of the boulder to crush Clive as he just stands there like a complete dumbass. 

Miss: So Clayton is bent on wiping out Washington D.C. with the psychic weather machine. Because evil military guy be evil and the script says so. 

Hit: But at least the movie provides a reason how Clayton developed his own psychic abilities.

Miss: Clayton talking to Ruben: "Young fool, only now at the end. Do you understand?" Oh fuck off movie!

Miss: *Jennifer and Adam fighting Rick.* This is my geek side talking but how exactly can fire deflect telekinesis?

Miss: Rick is basically a superpowered Elliot Rodger. 

Hits & Misses: Crossbreed

Miss: The movie opens with a space battle that looks like Discount Babylon 5.

Hit: Bennett from Commando!

Miss: Bennett was armed with a gun pointing at a guy in one scene. Gun just up and disappears as Bennett fights the guy in the next scene. Wasn't shown him throwing the gun away or was out of ammo or anything. Shitty editing I suppose.

Hit: Bennett just score some badass points from that fight scene.

Miss: And just like that Bennett is shot dead before completing his mission. 

Hit: *Ryker beats the crap out of a bunch of drunks causing problems in his bar.* Eat your heart out Dalton.

Hit/Miss: Basically the film's premise is the Expendables crossed with Doom (2005), rather silly but it tries to be somewhat unique.

Hit: Damn that Vivica A Fox cleavage though!

Hit: The sexbots in this movie are very impressive.

Miss: Although this one (dancing to Degenerate) needs a tune up immediately.

Real Talk: Slaughterhouse has a wife and kids now this is the part where I make a comment that he's another family man character whom merely exist as red shirt. But here's a no bullshit shocker, he actually survives in this movie. Seriously, I was blown away seeing this guy surviving all through the movie.  

Miss: *Ryker and his crew gearing up for their mission.* What the hell are these guys wearing on their faces? They look like a bunch of squiggly wires attached to their faces. Are these meant to be some type of cyberware, some commlink device? They just look so goofy.  

Miss: And here's where the Doom 2005 parallels come in. The new guy on the team is given the codename Noob, just like the rookie from Doom was given the codename The Kid. 

Real Talk: But unlike The Kid, Noob lives through the movie.

Miss: Oh yes these are clearly some fancy sci-fi guns and not a bunch of obvious nerf guns that were modified and painted black. You can just smell the budget that went into this movie.

Hit: I gotta be honest, the relationship between these guys are just cheesy and hilariously good. Yeah they're a bunch meat head goofballs but still.

Hit: "I fucking love Time Cop!"

Miss: "I fucking hate Time Cop..."

Miss: "Fuck Time Cop..."

Hit/Miss/LOL: These are on a mission until they start talking sex and steaks and ends on how Four Eyes and Slaughterhouse fucked Degenerate's sister.

LOL: Four Eyes: "And I fuck her but you already knew that." Degenerate: That's because I caught your ass with her." Four Eyes: "Yeah but at least you let me finished."

Miss: *Slaughterhouse and Noob in a fire fight with five Russians.* These guys are hitting the walls and yet you don't see the shots leaving any bullet holes.

Hit: Badass points to Noob.

Hit: Badass points to Slaughterhouse.

Miss: Ryker, Four Eyes and Degenerate are clearly wearing gas masks and not some redressed belt buckles.

Miss: Some of the talky scenes you can hear a tiny buzzing noise when characters are talking.

Miss: It's a good thing they keep the Crossbreed creature mostly in the shadows because the creature design is pretty average. Almost like a Discount Species creature.

Real Talk: But regardless this creature, I'd totally hit that.

Hit: Also creature boobs.

Real Talk: I feel more moved by the deaths of some of the characters in this movie than the ass clowns from The Predator.

Real Talk: Say what you want about this movie but it's nice step up for Vivica A Fox from Independence Day Resurgence or Cool Cat Saves the Kids. 

Miss: The Crossbreed creature mutates into some Discount Xenomorph.

Hit/LOL: Ryker: "I got an idea, everybody behind Miller."

Miss: Ryker's wearing body armor and still gets shot.

Miss: Noob: "I can see it in its eyes, it's thinking." That's very impressive kid, despite the fact it has no eyes.

Miss: Ryker sacrifices himself to kill the Crossbreed creature.

Hit: Slaughterhouse and Noob take over Ryker's bar.

Hit: As cheap and really cheesy this movie is, I still got some entertainment out of it.

Hits & Misses: Project MetalBeast

Hit: The US Military Intelligence in 1974 goes searching for werewolves to create superior combat agents. OK, that's actually a cool premise to start off the movie.

Miss: Did they just added Project in the title in post? That's what it looks like to me.

Hit: This werewolf design is not so impressive but it's not too shitty either.

Miss: Hey soldier guy, your buddy's being turn into a human chew toy. Care to shoot the werewolf before he's killed? No, you just gonna stand there until the werewolf's finished? OK then.

Miss: Butler talking to Colonel Miller: "Because of Greg's death? I didn't have any time." Bullshit you didn't, you were just standing there while the werewolf was having a late night snack on Greg. 

Miss: Clearly the blood sample has to be diseased considering it's from a werewolf.

Miss: And also maybe if Butler brought back the body instead of just blood samples this project would have plenty of samples to work with.

Miss: Butler didn't wanna wait for the the doctor lady to come back within a week for the results. So he decided to steal the last blood sample and injected into himself. Don't see nothing going wrong here.

Real Talk: Also why does this one men's restroom have a broken mirror?

Hit: Movie's got a catchy soundtrack.

Real Talk: So Butler attacks this one doctor lady and just leaves her all bloody. Um...OK.

Real Talk: Also does this mean she'll become a werewolf too?

Real Talk: *Butler in a cryo-freezer.* You can totally see the guy's junk.

Real Talk: It's 20 years later and Miller surprisingly ages well.

Miss: You mean the labs at this operations center don't have a freezer or a morgue so they put Butler's body in a kitchen freezer. That's not uncomfortable at all.

Hit: The practical effects of the Butler cadaver getting the bio-ferrin skin graft is pretty impressive. 

Miss: If only Miller stuck around through the operation he could've stopped them from removing the silver bullets out of Butler.

Miss: Also you would think Miller would have put in place some people making sure that Anna and crew doesn't discover the bullets. Or any other conspicuous details for that matter.

Miss: Oh yeah Miller, antagonize the recently revived  werewolf who maybe still pissed at you after 20 years.

Miss: Butler starts transforming and instead of running out of OR, Larry makes a phone call to Anna and Debbie but are inconveniently busy with identifying the not-cadaver. 

Hit: The make-up effects for the mid-transformation Butler looks impressive.

Miss: Oh yeah Anna, leave Roger all alone with mutating werewolf instead of making sure the thing's knocked out first.

Hit: Very impressive metal werewolf design.

Hit: Also hi Kane Hodder.... Umm Kane Hodder plays the MetalBeast.

Hit: So Philip melts silver with some bio-ferrin into three rocket launcher shells in a chance to take down the metal werewolf. Well at least it's a plan.

Miss: Miller's gun is loaded with silver bullets but decides to waste two shots on General Hammond. You know, the guy who's not a werewolf.

Miss: So what was Miller's plan with werewolf Butler anyway? Get him augmented with synthetic metallic skin and then what have him going around killing? He doesn't even have him under some type of control of any kind and just acts like everything's going to plan somehow. Not a well thought out villain this guy is. 

Miss: Anna was limping around after removing a rebar out of her foot only to run away from the MetalBeast just fine minutes later.

Miss: Debbie makes a hit on the MetalBeast's leg with the rocket launcher yet the shell doesn't even explode. How?

Hit: Although nice practical effect of the MetalBeast pulling the shell from his leg.

Hit: More credit to the practical effects as Anna fires the final shell at the MetalBeast and then he explodes into MetalBeast chunklets. 

Blindness: This has to be the first movie I've ever rage quit in history. I mean I've watched shitty movies but never once I just full stop in the middle of watching them. This movie is fucking depressing, degrading and wholly inhumane. Whatever message or point this movie was trying to convey it missed it by ten city blocks. There's just nothing redeemable with any of the characters and the government is run by assholes.

Hits & Misses: Morgan

Miss: This isn't a miss on the movie perse, this is a miss on the movie's trailer for being a complete lie. What the trailer implied is that Morgan develops some type of psychic powers over time, becoming uncontrollable. But upon watching the movie it turns out she just goes kill crazy, absolutely no psychic powers were displayed through the whole movie.

Hit: *Kathy gets stabbed in the eye by Morgan.* This movie wastes no time at all.

Hit: Kate Mara's kinda cute with short hair.

Miss: Hey isn't that Skip character played by that guy from The Predator (2018)? That movie is still disappointing.

Real Talk: Kathy talking to Lee: "You're a liar. There's a smile on your face but I can tell what you are. You're a goddamned assassin." I'm sure it's just the meds talking, this isn't foreshadowing at all.

Hit: Oh hey, Arnim Zola!

Miss: From what Ziegler's describing, it sounds like Morgan's a Discount Blade Runner Replicant. And that's a bit on the nose considering that Ridley Scott was one of the producers of this movie.

Miss: Everyone keeps saying "Lee Weathers from corporate" when the movie established that she's from SynSect. Is it really that hard to say "Lee Weathers from SynSect"?

Real Talk: The actress playing Amy looks a lot like Selma Blair, it's kinda weird.

Hit: Lee: "So did Darren and Brenda, did they pair up early?" Skip: "Pretty early, I guess. After he got tired of chasing after Amy." Not sure if that was an intended Chasing Amy reference but I'm counting it.

Miss: *Dr. Shapiro wants to talk to Morgan on the other side of the glass, completely disregarding the safety precautions. due to recent events* Well I don't see nothing that'll go horribly wrong here. I mean yeah the guy's just doing his job but still.  

Real Talk: At the start of the movie the psychologist is named Dr. Ben Shapiro yet when I'm looking on Wikipedia and IMDB his name is Dr. Alan Shapiro. Not really a miss just find it rather confusing.

Miss: So is the movie trying to established that Morgan can read minds I guess? I'm really not getting that impression from the plot and the scientists who created her aren't even acknowledging this aside from "she's special". 

Miss/Sarcastic: *Dr. Shapiro pressures Morgan with hypothetical questions until she gets agitated and viciously attacks him.* This movie isn't ripping off the Voigt-Kampff scene at the beginning of Blade Runner, nope that's just silly.

Miss: *The power to the lab miraculously shuts off while Morgan closes her eyes as that happens.* Again I'm not getting the impression of these ambiguous abilities that Morgan may or may not have. And once again the scientists are being oblivious about it. Am I supposed to assume that artificially created humans developed superpowers happens all the time with these people? Because that would be nice for the movie to establish in the story. 

Miss: None of scientists don't want to terminated Morgan but instead they packed up everything and tried leave with Morgan. I understand that these guys care for Morgan but judging from the trailer I doubt she'll return the same kindness.

Miss: Case in point... *Morgan attacks Darren and then kills him with an injection.*

Miss: And of course one of the scientists hesitates to shoot Morgan. Common sense, survival instincts, what are those?

Hit: Gotta give credit to Brenda trying to actually stop Morgan instead of hesitating like an idiot.

Miss: The movie reveals that Morgan can't move beyond her weaponized design parameters despite the scientists trying to promote emotional intelligence, which explains why she's going kill crazy. So what's with the movie and the trailer giving confusingly vague implications of Morgan having superpowers? Whoever was in charge of scriptwriting or post-production must've got really confused on what story to go with. 

Miss: Dead Arnim Zola, no idea why killed himself but here he is just hung himself.

Miss/Sarcastic: *Morgan and Dr. Cheng have a talk before Morgan kills her creator.* This movie isn't ripping off the scene of Roy Batty talking to Tyrell before he kills his creator, nope that's just silly.

Miss: Hell both scenes features the creations giving their creators a kiss before killing them. 

Miss: Might as well go all the way with Lee becoming a Blade Runner out to "retire" Morgan.

Real Talk: I don't mean to be making comparisons to Blade Runner but that's the vibe I keep getting from this movie. I wouldn't be surprised if they took some concepts from Blade Runner.

Hit: Lee vs Morgan

Hit: Kinda getting a Noomi Rapace vibe from Lee in this fight scene.

Miss: What was the point of Lee killing Skip and Amy? SynSect probably ordered her to kill the people of the L-9 project but still.

Hit: Not gonna lie the reveal of Lee being an L-4 was a nice, subtle touch.

Hits & Misses: BloodRayne

Miss: The first BloodRayne game was essentially about a sexy, bad ass Dhampir killing Nazis. This movie on the other hand takes place in 18th century Romania. Now the third movie does feature a Dhampir killing Nazis but I sincerely doubt it's faithful to the first game. And fuck no I'm not watching the sequels or that retarded spoof Boll made.

Hit: Movie uses the same title font design from the games.

Hit: For what it's worth, the set designs are OK.

Miss: "Based on the Majesco Video Game entitled BloodRayne" I think this sentence needs to be edited to "(Loosely) Based on the Majesco Video Game entitled BloodRayne". It's a lot more accurate.

Miss: Poor Michael Madsen was dragged into this garbage.

Hit: Also Michael Madsen.

Miss: Poor Michelle Rodriguez was dragged into this garbage.

Hit: Also Michelle Rodriguez.

Miss: Poor Kristanna Loken was dragged into this garbage.

Hit: Also Kristanna Loken.

Miss: Vampires are common knowledge in this film's world from what I can tell. Yet people at a traveling circus are amazed at a woman who's harmed by water and feeds on blood to heal herself.

Miss: Poor Ben Kingsley was dragged into this garbage.

Hit: Also Ben Kingsley.

Miss: Instead of showing Rayne going on a bloodlust and killed some of the carnies in sight. Movie decides that it's better to show it as a flashback while it cuts to Rayne confused and screaming quite annoyingly. As if she probably forgot the whole thing because the script says so.

Miss: Also great idea for this one carny attempting to rape a Dhampir, don't see nothing going horribly wrong here.

Miss: Poor Billy Zane was dragged into this garbage.

Hit: Also Billy Zane

Miss: *Elrich requesting a message to be sent to his daughter, Katarin.* Most movies I've seen Billy Zane in he's usually quite entertainly hammy but in this scene it's like his very soul was drained out of him. And just comes off as him getting his scenes over with so he can leave the movie immediately.

Hit: Rayne's first outfit is pretty spot on from the games.

Miss: *Rayne on horseback.* Wearing a completely different outfit in a scene before arriving at a town, wearing her first outfit in a scene after she arrives in the town. Continuity, what's that?

Miss: This talisman Rayne finds that gives her immunity over holy water (at least I'm assuming it's holy water, the movie doesn't establish it). So why would this one room have a secondary trap that any vampire would be easily unaffected by if they obtain this talisman? And it's not like the room was being fully flooded with holy water, only about a few inches tops. Rayne could've easily ran out of the room.

Miss: Poor Udo Kier was dragged into this garbage.

Hit: Also Udo Kier.

Miss: So it's just plain ordinary water that kills vampires instead of holy water. I understand that running water is a weakness to vampires but how is plain, unblessed water is able to harm them?

Miss: So this ancient vampire developed an immunity over sunlight, water and crosses and yet he was still killed without the movie explaining how. Unless we're supposed to assume that he didn't developed an immunity to stakes to the heart or just shitty writing.

Miss: Now this fight scene at the monastery seems cool but these close up shots and quick cuts are making it difficult to enjoy it. And I can't help that the fight choreography is a bit stiff at times. 

Hit: But I gotta give credit for the gore effects though.

Hit: Vampire Boobs, everywhere!

Miss: Poor Meat Loaf Aday was dragged into this garbage.

Hit: Also Meat Loaf Aday.

Hit: Also, also gotta give credit to Meat Loaf's hammy performance in a sea of deadpan acting.

Miss: Rayne tells Vladimir, Sebastian and Katarin that Kagan raped and murdered her mother in front of her. Yet in the flashback there was a murder but no rape at all. I'd guess that the raped happened before Rayne was born but the shit writing doesn't seem to convey it that way.

Miss: Also that was rather unnecessary to have a flashback if Rayne was gonna tell what happened.

Miss: Even in a training montage the fight choreography looks stiff.

Hit: *Rayne and Sebastian having sex.* A better vampire sex scene than Twilight Breaking Dawn.

Hit: Also Rayne Boobs.

Miss: However, I'm not convince that Rayne is completely pantsless in certain angles where her bottom half is obscured.

Hit: Rayne's wearing a variation of her outfit that's pretty spot on from games. 

Hit: Also Rayne cleavage. 

Hit: Say what you want about Michelle Rodriguez but at least her acting's pretty good with that accent. Even though it's a real shame that her time and talent are wasted in this garbage film.

Miss: Although I'm a bit distracted that she's wearing blue contacts. I mean they could've just get an actress with blue eyes for the Katarin character?

Hit: *Domastir throws a dismembered head on Elrich's desk, then a letter from Katarin.* Elrich: "Would you stop throwing things at me."

Miss: So holy water is a thing in this world then how does plain water hurts vampires again?

Miss: Oh yeah, so much for "I don't thirst for human blood". I mean yeah Katarin betrayed Brimstone and had it coming but Rayne still fed blood from a human.  This is what happens when you a vampire who doesn't feed on human blood, inconsistency rears its ugly head before you know it.

Miss: Also what happened to those four other guys who were with Katarin? Are they still at the underwater entrance waiting for Katarin to come back? Did they assume that she drowned and piss off elsewhere? Did the movie deem them irrelevant and banished them into the void?

Miss: So Rayne's not gonna tell Vladimir and Sebastian that Katarin betrayed Brimstone and she killed her? OK then.

Miss: Also "she died with honor, fighting for our people" my ass.

Miss: More fight scenes with close up shots and quick cuts with a dash of unnecessary fast motion blurs this time.

Miss: Hey Vladimir you just got stabbed in the chest, maybe show a reaction to that? Like screaming in agony or something. No, you just gonna keep that deadpan reaction then? OK, fine.

Real Talk: So Kagan's dead and Rayne has all three talismans, will this be followed up in the two sequels? Don't know, don't care.