Hit: Bennett from Commando!
Miss: Bennett was armed with a gun pointing at a guy in one scene. Gun just up and disappears as Bennett fights the guy in the next scene. Wasn't shown him throwing the gun away or was out of ammo or anything. Shitty editing I suppose.
Hit: Bennett just score some badass points from that fight scene.
Miss: And just like that Bennett is shot dead before completing his mission.
Hit: *Ryker beats the crap out of a bunch of drunks causing problems in his bar.* Eat your heart out Dalton.
Hit/Miss: Basically the film's premise is the Expendables crossed with Doom (2005), rather silly but it tries to be somewhat unique.
Hit: Damn that Vivica A Fox cleavage though!
Hit: The sexbots in this movie are very impressive.
Miss: Although this one (dancing to Degenerate) needs a tune up immediately.
Real Talk: Slaughterhouse has a wife and kids now this is the part where I make a comment that he's another family man character whom merely exist as red shirt. But here's a no bullshit shocker, he actually survives in this movie. Seriously, I was blown away seeing this guy surviving all through the movie.
Miss: *Ryker and his crew gearing up for their mission.* What the hell are these guys wearing on their faces? They look like a bunch of squiggly wires attached to their faces. Are these meant to be some type of cyberware, some commlink device? They just look so goofy.
Miss: And here's where the Doom 2005 parallels come in. The new guy on the team is given the codename Noob, just like the rookie from Doom was given the codename The Kid.
Real Talk: But unlike The Kid, Noob lives through the movie.
Miss: Oh yes these are clearly some fancy sci-fi guns and not a bunch of obvious nerf guns that were modified and painted black. You can just smell the budget that went into this movie.
Hit: I gotta be honest, the relationship between these guys are just cheesy and hilariously good. Yeah they're a bunch meat head goofballs but still.
Hit: "I fucking love Time Cop!"
Miss: "I fucking hate Time Cop..."
Miss: "Fuck Time Cop..."
Hit/Miss/LOL: These are on a mission until they start talking sex and steaks and ends on how Four Eyes and Slaughterhouse fucked Degenerate's sister.
LOL: Four Eyes: "And I fuck her but you already knew that." Degenerate: That's because I caught your ass with her." Four Eyes: "Yeah but at least you let me finished."
Miss: *Slaughterhouse and Noob in a fire fight with five Russians.* These guys are hitting the walls and yet you don't see the shots leaving any bullet holes.
Hit: Badass points to Noob.
Hit: Badass points to Slaughterhouse.
Miss: Ryker, Four Eyes and Degenerate are clearly wearing gas masks and not some redressed belt buckles.
Miss: Some of the talky scenes you can hear a tiny buzzing noise when characters are talking.
Miss: It's a good thing they keep the Crossbreed creature mostly in the shadows because the creature design is pretty average. Almost like a Discount Species creature.
Real Talk: But regardless this creature, I'd totally hit that.
Hit: Also creature boobs.
Real Talk: I feel more moved by the deaths of some of the characters in this movie than the ass clowns from The Predator.
Real Talk: Say what you want about this movie but it's nice step up for Vivica A Fox from Independence Day Resurgence or Cool Cat Saves the Kids.
Miss: The Crossbreed creature mutates into some Discount Xenomorph.
Hit/LOL: Ryker: "I got an idea, everybody behind Miller."
Miss: Ryker's wearing body armor and still gets shot.
Miss: Noob: "I can see it in its eyes, it's thinking." That's very impressive kid, despite the fact it has no eyes.
Miss: Ryker sacrifices himself to kill the Crossbreed creature.
Hit: Slaughterhouse and Noob take over Ryker's bar.
Hit: As cheap and really cheesy this movie is, I still got some entertainment out of it.
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